Photo A Day: To pee or not to pee ...

Out and about yesterday, I discovered that I could no

longer shop until I took a quick moment to visit the

bathroom. The only problem was that I was in Krogers

market, at the time. Oh sure, they have restrooms that are

used by the employees as well as the customers but getting
TO them is the part that bothers me.

First off, they're located behind those 2 big scary doors that

you always see in the meat department. You know the one's.

There's usually a HUGE scary guy in a white outfit walking

in and out of them ... blood all over him with a meat cleaver

in his hand. Kinda gives you that same sense of security as

you had while watching the movie "Midnight Meat Train" ...

Anyhow, once beyond those doors the first thing you see up

ahead is the sign "RESTROOMS" giving you a false sense

of hope because as you begin to get your bearings and start

looking around, you realize you are in the perfect setting to

to be the next "scream queen" of a Wes Craven movie.

BUT alas, you have to go ... you lock your eyes on the stairs

located just below the sign ... can you make it before the mad

butcher notices you're there? The next moments will tell ...

So off I sprint to the staircase and scurry down while

continually looking over my shoulder for "The Butcher Man".

I see the sign "Women's" and rush in, locking the door quickly

behind me. I go into the stall for a moment of relaxation before

I have to plan my escape and as I reach for the toilet paper ...

*GULP* ... This is NOT a good sign, at all. A victim before

me ... their final plea for HELP. I hope they made it ...

I consider making a "Blair Witch" type of video as I sat

there wondering what to do next. At least then, friends and

family wouldn't have to wonder why I went missing as I sit

wrapped so nicely in the meat section with a sticker that

reads "$2.69 per lb".

But I quickly ditch that idea with a sudden energy and will,

to SURVIVE! I can live thru this! I gathered my new found

guts (before the butcher could) and ran like the wind!

I burst through the doors into the unknowing faces of happy,

unaware customers as they scrutinize packages of ground

beef. If only they knew ... that could have been ME in there.